May 4, 200719 yr I'm very appreciative for your comments and help, I've been composing for less than 1 year and feel very naive compared to all of you. I'm 15 years old and play violin in my schools top orchestra, i enjoy music and I hope you can help me become a better musician. revised song1.MUS Beaman 3, MM.MUS
May 6, 200719 yr Take the time to talk about yourself or the music cuz otherwise you're not getting comments.
May 10, 200719 yr These two songs were interesting, but a little bit too chromatic. The first one (revised song 1...come on you can think of a better title than that!) got a little bit annoying in the unison measures with quarter rest, 4 sixteenths, quarter rest, 4 sixteenths, but it was interesting. I would reccommend putting a melody on top of that sooner in the song, to tie it all together.
May 12, 200719 yr Arg. For some reason this reminds me of pirates of the carribean too... but nonetheless i like both songs. And btw.. i like the first songs title. It reminded me of like a battle scene from a movie. Or two armies getting ready to battle. The slower part reminded me of something sad happening in the middle of a battle or something like that.
May 12, 200719 yr I didn't really like the first one that much. It sounds like you didn't make good transitions between a unison and multiple part harmonies from the first section into the next one. In fact, I didn't like any of your transitions. They weren't very strong. In measures like, 89-92 the 16th note trill thing is very annoying and needs something on top of it. And, lastly, work on your string harmonies... they are nice but could be little more interesting, especially if this is intended as a concert piece. The second piece was very chromatic. Around measure 30 is actually where it started to catch my interest.. because it changes. I did like that transition, very unexpected too in harmonics (the shift from non-traditional tonal to more-so-tonal). However I don't see how the two parts relate yet. These two sections have nothing in common, where you going for an A and B section, because this just sounds like two different pieces put together written by two different composers... measure 65 is very exciting... very jazzy. But here... we have a section that once again does not fit with the first part. However, it goes quite nicely with the second part. And here we are... i am at the end of the piece. Sort of understanding what you were going for. I think this will work. But, you could try imputing some more non-traditional harmonies in the song's middle section to bring out the (I hate to use this word...) atonality of the first section, even though it really isn't atonal. But, i would just to tie it all up. It isn't nice to give a present without a bow. And lastly, nice pieces, and I am sorry for being so blunt and rudish, it is just I have had a very bad day and you just happened to be the one I commented on. Sorry. ~Morivou~
