January 3, 200620 yr Hi everyone! Im 16 years old and am not very good at composing, i have joined this forum to get help to get better. Anyway here are 2 of my pieces that i composed about a year ago and would really like some critisism. The special occasion piece was written for my parents silver aniversary which is taking place in a few years. The remebered person piece was written about a friend who left my life, at the start there is sadness but towards the end there is more hope. Thanks !! ;) Remembered_Person__Film_music_.mid Speciel_Occassion.mid
January 3, 200620 yr Alright Ben, the beginning to your first piece is a bit weak. You don't seem to have a well established melody and it's really rather plain. You need to add some dynamic markings. When the flute comes in...that part doesn't really make a lot of sense with the beginning of your piece. The melodic material with the flute could be nice, but you need to expand it and make it more interesting. It seemed way too boring. Your ending wasn't interesting either. It ended like ever other song in the world. Please...use some diversity. I know you are new at this, but diversity is always good and you need to establish your own style of writing and not someone elses. If I was to rate Remembered Person...I'm sorry but 3 out of 10. Once again, in your second piece the melody is not well established. There you go again around 1:00! Completely stopping and adding something that makes no sense with what you had going at the beginning. I'm glad you did at some diversity at around 1:30 even though the melody made no sense whatsoever. And you have done it again at around 2:00...once again stopping and starting something that makes no sense with what you started with. I did like your ending stuff better. You seemed to use the rest of the ensemble more, but once again a very typical and boring ending. The rating for this one will have to be 2 out of 10. Sorry, but I have to be honest. Keep composing! I hope my comments where not too harsh, but I must tell the truth.
January 3, 200620 yr Ok so here's my review as promised. Be afraid. ...Anywho, I don't think it's worth going into any detail about each song since they're basically the same thing split in half. I think you have a great start and you've got the feel for film music, but you need to work on making your works more coherent. I have one word for you: TRANSITIONS. You seem to enjoy somewhat developing a theme and then dropping out and going somewhere completely different. Makes me imagine a small elf with A.D.D trying to write music. In any case, you need to work on that as well as doing some more work with your melodies and what you try to convey through them. Neither of your pieces came even remotely close to bringing up the images intended and they sound similar enough that you may as well shove them into one piece; save some space. Negative comments aside, like I said, you've got the feel for it and this is a great start, so keep up the work, post your stuff up here so you can get comments as you progress and enjoy the ride. Good luck!
January 4, 200620 yr Well. I don't agree. These are simple pieces with no great pretensions, isn't that obvious? As such, I think they've deficiencies but are otherwise fine, especially for a beginner (just think about the endings, for example). but I've seen way worse samples composed by people with teachers... Obviously, lots of study and practice is in order for you. The question is whether you want to compose commonplace, simple pieces or not? If you have an aspiration to write something that's serious and meaningful, you've got a lot to do. That's my comment for you. :happy:
January 4, 200620 yr "Makes me imagine a small elf with A.D.D trying to write music." lol Well, he very well could be. (Just kidding Ben! Good effort on your beginner pieces!)
January 4, 200620 yr Author How do you think i could get better, I would love to be able to write a meaningful and serious love pop song some day. Any advice about learning or what books to get? (i live in the UK) Thanks for the critisism guys and hope you can give me more sometime soon :) PS. If i manage to get this performed someday do you think it would be better cause of the realistic sounds and such.
January 5, 200620 yr Hold on there buddy, you need to take our advice and fix it before getting it performed. Books....I would just get tips from your director. I will be getting 2 books soon. They are the little red books by Alfred. They are the Orchestration book and the Theory one. If you would like the links to those to order, just send me a pm. I don't have the links with me right now.
