Waltz No.1 [first piece posted]

Finally I decided to bite the bullet and post my first submission.

It's submitted for scrutiny, so please don't worry about being harsh--any advice or criticism at all would be great.

Note that I lack theory background, and as such, I'm aware of many significant problems.

Any thoughts or advice on this piece?

WaltzNo1__.pdf

Hello and welcome,

I'd like to listen to your piece, but I don't have access to a piano now. How about a MP3 or at least MIDI?

MIDI?

A VERY NEAT SCORE! I dislike pedal markings unless they are absolutely neccesary... but anyhow, they seem well. Remove the braces over the triplets. One only use braces over a triplet like, say when you have one rest and two notes. Thus, remove the braces. The bows are sometimes messy and the score can be better. In some places, the rests can be improved (as in the final bar for example).

The octave in bar 10 seems strange. Perhaps an octave above?

Seems okay. A MIDI might help!

Good luck!

Thanks for looking at this!

Pieter, your comments are much appreciated. I'll remove the braces and pedal notation. The octave at measure 10 is an 8vb, so an octave lower, but you are right that it is awkward; I should probably just switch staves for that section.

An mp3 is attached. Please note a few things: the software can't insert, for example, the breath (the pause) between measure 69 and 70, where there should be silence for about 3/4 of a second or so. Also, the other standard things apply about odd arpeggios, volumes, speeds, etc...

== Edit ==

Thanks for the suggestion; link added :

http://www.box.net/shared/95y9oamqi3

I'd like to listen to this too...

I don't think your mp3 attachment went through. You should either attach a midi instead or upload your mp3 to a host like Box.net

Per the suggestions above, here's a link to the mp3:

Waltz No1 raw mp3.mp3 - File Shared from Box.net - Free Online File Storage

My apologies for posting the mp3 so late. If you have any, I'd love to hear any criticism, thoughts, or advice...

A General Perspective

Your harmonic language is spectacularly colourful, especially when you're not in strongly tonal zones. Systems 2-3 of p. 2 are fully established in the key of Ab Major, and it provides an interesting contrast to the loosely modal E Major of the beginning. Your modulation at the immediately following tempo change is an incredibly seamless restatement of the original theme. Everything thereafter is simply... lovely. A very placid piece indeed.

Suggestions and Advice

The main thing you should work on is refinishing the crazily awkward score. It's so awkward that I even had trouble spitting out this review, which can't be good! :sweat: Here are some things to focus on score-wise:

i) The way the accidentals are used in the score is very confusing. There are several intervals that look bigger when they're really only whole steps. This can be solved easily enough by modulating into different keys. Like I mentioned earlier, there's a big modulation into Ab Major that isn't reflected in the score at all.

ii) There are also some slight metric changes that aren't really shown in the music (especially the last two measures of p. 1 into the first system of p. 2 and the ending). This kind of weakens the title of the piece, but it's still 95% waltz-like.

iii) This is a fairly minor issue, but the moments where the right hand is in a lower register can be read much easier if you just transpose to the Bass Clef temporarily instead. Having the 8vb in its place, while achieving the same effect, is fairly unconventional when writing for the right hand.

Other than that, there are several instances where you have some thick chords in the left hand at a fairly quiet volume... In most cases this can sound rather muddy and should be cleaned up. Try spacing out the chord(s) or omitting notes that are already present in the right hand.

Final Thoughts

Nice work! This is really impressive for someone lacking a theory background... it's clear you have good musical instincts. :)

the not very predictable harmony keeps me interested. like Dustin said, for someone lacking theory background like you, its actually really good.

Justin and chodelkovzart, thank you for your comments and advice.

I'll reply more fully later--by editing this post--but for now am just replying briefly so that you know I thank you for taking the time to write and listen.