Worried

this music is supposed to describe a scene where someone is worried about a person who is really close to him , and thinks that she's in danger , or that there's something wrong but he dont know whats wrong . !

Worried

m30-63 are absolutely brilliant! Just kidding I kinda get your idea, but I don't think this is the best way to get it across. You didnt convince me of the scene of someone being worried. I felt the instrumentation was pretty sparse and shallow, because of all the long notes, and the haphazardous way of putting it together. I don't get why you use a dotted-half note tied to a eight note and a rest in the bassoon part. I suppose it is just to get your software produce the correct tone - which shouldn't be your main goal if you don't use high quality sounds. I found the pianopart very boring. Very repetitive, and just the whole notion of repetitive notes in the right hand against very repetitive chords in the left hand (and the rhythm too) I found not done. I am sorry and don't take this personal, but this was not your best work in my opinion. This felt like a draft to an introduction of a bigger piece. By no means did it feel like a stand-alone piece.

hey , thanks for the reply , actually i did this piece in a hurry , i have alot of studying and it was just a musical break from it . as for not getting an idea of a worried scene , i actually dont agree with you as i wanted to do something beyond the normal concept of a worried like thing . ( havent used a lot of high pitched , and i tried to do it using long notes , maybe it didnt work , but you cant blame me for trying , its not a film score so basically i just learned from this piece . and for the bassoon part , its just to not make the note too long so that a player's breath would suffer . so basically its just for making it sound better and more realistic . and the piano part is intended to be reptetitive , to give a feeling of being sad . i dont know how to explain it , but maybe it didnt work hehe and sounded boring:) . anyway thanks alot for the review ; this kind of reviews is what makes YC a great place for feedback . thanks again .

The piano immediately turned me off. The straight eighth note rhythm was just kind of blah and almost boring. From your post I see you were trying to go for a certain feel, and maybe it's just me and him, but I didn't feel it. However, the chord progressions in the orchestra later on were quite pretty. I respect the fact you were trying to go for something different and I think you could pull it off, but as you said, you hurried this so it probably didn't turn out quite right. The ending seems to lead off into nowhere, but I'm going to assume it as an artistic touch or the fact that you wrote it as a film score. Your explanation for the rhythm in the bassoon part doesn't make all that much sense to me. I don't feel that an extra eighth note is going to make much of a difference. If anything, I'd say you just wanted the space between the end of that note and the next one. The piece is rather pretty later on though. Not your best but understandable since, as you said, you were in a hurry and trying something new.

Abd, I really dig the chords your using, though they get a tad repetitive, along with the melody. Change it up some brother! I am really enjoying the ambiance when the piece starts kicking in. For some reason it reminds me of the tenant score.

Great work! I look forward to hearing more!

Thoughts on looking at the score and listening:

write instrument abbreviations on every single page!!!

you can't write cresc on a lot of trumpet notes. They don't know where they come from and where they are heading. Write a dynamic and a hairpin

Whenever and instrument starts: write a dynamic - whenever an instrument has more than a measure of break: write a dynamic

dynamics should be connected to the first note, not the bar before.

write 'triangle' before it starts playing

ms 28-29 left me kind of perplexed. it started to get dillute from your perspective and the triangle made me feel that it was all just a tv commercial

roy: the way the bassoon part is notated makes perfect sense! leave it like that.

you can't agree or not on whether someone interprets it the way you do. As for me I think I'm left with the same feeling as Roy. The piano could be helped by playing it live in with a midi keyboard. Maybe and alternation in rhythm: for example eightnote-quarternote-eightnote pattern.

Thanks for posting! This has a nice tone.

Thomas

adamich:, thanks for the comment , actually i was aiming for a feeling close to the tenant film soundtrack.and i'll learn from this piece that i should do more changes and specially for the piano . thanks for the comment

Bryla:thanks for the comment , i dont know how to write instruments abbreviations on every page , im using Sibelius and if you know how, please tell me:).

thanks for the rich information about the dynamics writing , ill sure keep that in mind .i thought the triangle give it a nice feeling hehe , and now im confused about the bassoon writings! hehe , ill keep it the same . anyway next time ill write something ill keep your advices in mind . thanks for the comment

your intentions about the bassoon are clearly written, and your explanation to why you wrote it fits the notation.

abbreviations: go to Engraving Rules (Ctrl-shift-E or Cmd-shift-E (mac)). I believe the menu in Engraving Rules is just called 'Instruments', and then the drop-down menus should normally read: Full, Short, None from top to bottom

good feedback bryla, i agree about the mechanical piano,once the instrument come in its less notable and sounds pretty neat.

i can hear in mind what it is you're trying to convey, since the writing has that worried sound, but it would be greatly make it much more emotional if you could play those instruments(sampled of course). so i think you should get a sequencer and a keyboard, if you haven't considered it yet.

neat one abed.

thanks bryla for the comments.

The J , i have a keyboard with a midi connection , eveything i need is there , but the problem is that i've been playing keyboard for around 3 months now , i cant play difficult pieces , but i can play this piece on piano , but i rarely concider inputting anything using the keyboard just because im not that good

abd, i have the same problem i'm a professional guitarist, but i'm always learning piano, simple classical, or pop sings, or being able to improvise, comping styles and so on.

since the genre in which we compose requires us to make it sound real, the only way to make it is to make it sound convincing as played for real. scores as mockup simply don't have that "live" vibe. i thought of even buying a midi guitar if i hadn't heard there are so many problems with it. hope it helps.

Hey abd. How are you?

First off, what I immediately noticed is that the piano velocities are pretty much the same, you got a bit of that robotic feel on those repeated notes, some humanizing is needed there. The piece itself being pretty short has a nice atmosphere indeed, but I'm not really sure what it reminds me of, I think it could be used in a lots of scenes, including the one you mentioned. Sound is pretty good, except that piano I mentioned and it has a strange kind of reverb, don't know if you intended that or... but anyway, it's a nice little piece.