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Hello everyone, this is the piece I newly composed, hope you like it.

Edited by cloud10000
for some adjustment
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It is truly lovely..  The melody (and piano) moves along for a period with consistent note durations, and later, uses notes of varying length. Perhaps, a bit of note length variation earlier, might be something yout consider doing earlier .. Some half and whole notes, would let the listeners 'rest and catch his breath'..

The piano phrasing near the end of the piece, and the call/response of string and piano was totally excellent..  That totally got 'all my attention'..  The earlier section of piece, not as much, cause my brain, had already guessed how everything would continue,  and my mental focus started to wander..  But ending section,  I had to pay full attention and was  richly awarded for doing so..  

Very good. 

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  • 2 weeks later...

Good job overall. A few things to look at:
0:4: when this figure repeats, a diminished triad is not appropriate. In this case, D5 is preferred over C5 (right hand) when the left hand plays D and F-sharp.
0:12: slightly awkward transition between two chord progressions, V24 and I6 or V/V7 and I would be preferred over V24 and I. This should be forrowed by a little passage ending on V of G major, as the piece returns to the beginning here, which is awkward.
0:20: E and B vs G-sharp and D (piano left hand) due to parallel octaves
C-sharps and C-naturals do not harmonize well. These passages occur several times throughout the piece.
0:22: V/V7/Iv preferred over V24/Iv
0:25: when the violin plays F6, a G major chord would harmonize it nicely, as the transition from D minor to C major chord is slightly awkward in this context
I am noticing some awkward harmonies in several spots, but I can't figure out what's wrong. I would go through the piece and figure it out yourself.
0:52: you end the section with the right chord progression, but could you extend it a bit here? It sounds a little incomplete.
During the passage with the pizzicatos, you can have more motion in the piano part.
1:4: awkward harmony. When violin plays Fs, the piano can play G major triads with or without the added seventh or a B diminished seventh chord
1:56: when the violin plays E-flats, the piano can play a C minor tonic triad
2:1: piano right hand plays notes that doesn't fit with the rest of the parts
2:4: root position vs second inversion
2:42: B-flat preferred over D (left hand)
2:44: C preferred over E (left hand)
2:49: musically awkward leap in violin part
2:58: incomplete section
3:14 and 4:54: awkward key changes
3:23 and 3:37: C major chord preferred over E minor chord when violin plays E
3:26 and 3:40: root position preferred over first inversion chord
3:46: D-sharp preferred over D-natural (right hand). B preferred over F-sharp (left hand).
3:48: E preferred over B (left hand)
There are several long pauses in the piano part that should be filled in.
4:24: G preferred over A (right hand)
4:25: unnecessary chord change after V56 (B-flat major)
4:32: F-sharp and D vs A and F-sharp (left hand)
4:41: D vs F-sharp (left hand)
5:9: G vs F (right hand)
4:13: E vs D (left hand)
5:15: F-sharp (left hand) can be followed or replaced by E
5:56: D vs C (left hand)

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