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Adagio in C major for Keyboard.


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Hi, this is a short  slow piece I composed yesterday and finished today (july 30) I also composed the first section  of an Andante but I will share it next week, I have to travel tomorrow

Yesterday I was basically¬† reading about bass¬† movements and that kind of stuff and i wrote this ūüėĀ

If you have any advice or tips, they're welcome as always.

I hope you like it  

-Aaron

Edited by 44W74l4
Voice leading
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  • 44W74l4 changed the title to Adagio in C major for Keyboard.

 

Overall I think this a nice piece! I think the second half could be extended, and venture into a minor key, for example a minor, this would bring some "drama" to the piece in contrast to the overall Major tonality. But with how short and the ultimate purpose of the piece I can see why you kept the second hand to 16 measures. To me this reminds me of a minuet (though the time signature says otherwise), I think looking into the Galant Schemas Monte and Fonte, which were common to start the second half of a binary piece during the classical era. Overall, again nice work! Can't wait to hear more!

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Hi Aaron,

I like you are really developing your materials and taking progress. Your bass writing is definitely improving with move movements added, great job!

I agree with @Guardian25 that you can venture to different keys other than G major in the second half, since that key is already established near the end of the first half.

For the voice leading, you may go for a Bb in the last B natural in b.1, add a top C in the last chord of b.2, 4, 18 &20 (since it's right after a tritone F-B, a E-C resolution will be great), b.7 add a G on top of the last chord.

Thx for sharing!

Henry

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¬†TńďnńĀ Koe Aaron,

 

Wow, this is really good. It put a smile on my face as I listened to it.

A few comments/caveats:

  • Your melody lack design and clear melodic phrases. I think a good next step for you would be to study phrasing in music, phrase structure and melodic design as these are all essental things to composition. Otherwise, your melodies are getting much better.
  • The piano left hand was a bit boring in the A-section, maybe try vary it up a bit.

Other than a few odd criticisms, this is good. You're definitely improving Aaron, keep it up!

 

Nga Mihi,

Arjuna

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Sounds great.

Just a note about the harmony.
As an example, in measure 4 this happens: G - D - G - G - D... and then G - D....

Although there is the necessary dominant - tonic tension, the repetition of the same chords takes away a bit of interest.
Other variations can be used, such as introducing the ii:
Am - D - G - D... and in the following measure the iii: Em....

I also think that adding expression marks would help to make it sound better, even if it is digital.

 

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  • 2 months later...

This does in fact show some good awareness of good bass motion and relation to the melody.  I think the other commenters in this thread have already said lots of great useful things to improve upon.  I would just add to what @Luis Hernández already mentioned that being able to jump into circle-of-fifths motion at any point in a progression can be really useful as that kind of chordal and bass motion can be very strong and interesting and will help you to create more harmonically interesting pieces that aren't so reliant on repeating dominant-tonic resolutions.  It's hard to write slow movements too - not my particular favorite thing to do as I like stuff that moves more quickly.  Thanks for sharing!

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