Yo
So this is clearly phenomenal, and like @Henry Ng Tsz Kiu, I'm in awe of the orchestration. It's your biggest strength in the piece to me, as you wield such a masterful grasp of its power, ferocity, lushness, beauty, vividness, intensity, etc. etc. This is one of the best displays of orchestration I've ever heard on this site, and I've been roaming around here for over a decade.
I could go on and on about it tbh. I loved it that much. Especially the more subtle sections. The fiery bit around 152, leading to a grander version around 210 (these measure numbers are probably way off, I'm just skimming the score now), the little spot at 262 leading into the fantastic largo section, the Mahler-esque next section...it goes on lol.
I really like your goal of keeping to 2 motifs for the bulk of the development. I think, for one, it makes your music very cohesive, but it's also a great display of your compositional technique. Whenever we limit ourselves and impose restrictions, I feel like we get more creative when boundaries are given.
And speaking of that:
You have more movements in the works, right? Why not establish themes in this one and develop them later?
Even though I heard various shades of Stravinsky throughout the piece, it sounds like he was an inspiration to you rather than a quote. This was very neo-Stravinsky to me in multiple ways, but you gave it enough character of your own to make it unique to you.
I have two critiques, and I'd say they're subjective, but take them as you will. The first one is very minor, but lately I've been more picky about this because I've struggled with this in my own music. The ending doesn't do it for me. You could literally chop off the last 3 measures and it would be way better imo, just to keep that dissonant language going a bit more. The final cadence just doesn't sound like it belongs, like you gave us a riveting story and on the last page you said, "oh, and they lived happily ever after." But hey, it's your music, and if you like it then great!
My bigger issue was the pacing throughout the...
let's see here...
27 minutes!
With all of it's wonderful color, textures, harmonic choices, motivic development, and every other aspect of music, it was mainly slow throughout. Sure, there were faster moments here and there, but most of them felt like builds and swells versus presenting the music at a faster pace. I felt like you constantly lost momentum, and it would have been great to me at least to have a bit more drive, especially when you built up your music.
Who knows though, maybe you have that in mind for future movements (which is why I don't like listening to one movement without hearing the others, but this was too good not to share some thoughts). But even if you do, it's 27 minutes long, it could be a symphony in one movement to me.
Just my own personal opinions though. This is wonderful in every way, and I'm really glad you shared a major work with us. I'll never understand how you can work backwards from how I work; I just can't keep track of everything in the DAW, I have to see the notes when writing. But your method is obviously finely tuned, and your artistry is something that I admire every time I hear your music.
Masterful job, and thanks so much for sharing this! I'll be revisiting this in the future to study up on any questions I have orchestrating, as well as to enjoy this once more. 🙂
- #1 better-than-Henry gmm fanboi