First Upload! - Appassionata in G-Sharp Minor

Hello!

This is my first post, thread, and upload as a Young Composers member.

My piece is a short piano piece which I titled "Appassionata in G-Sharp Minor". I love how much emotion I put into it.

Note: I hate, hate, hate the very last measure.

All criticisms are welcome!

Thank you! :D

Appassionata in G-Sharp Minor - Caesura.pdf

Appassionata in G-Sharp Minor.MID

Appassionata in G-Sharp Minor.MUS

Hello Caesura,

Firts off: welcome to YC! A general rule here is if you comment on other people there music, there will more likely return the favor.

To your music: I felt it became a bit static near the end. If you want to write this type of music, take notice of the flow of your piece. I always think in therms of choreography. I feel a romatic, classical piece of music should always be able to be choreographed. People should be able to write some sort of smooth bodymovements to it. That's just me of course.

I couldn't really relate to the heavy emotion. But i think it's an enjoyable little piece. Maybe you can expand on it. It's fairly short like this.

Well, thanks for sharing Caesura.

I love how much emotion I put into it.

I luld. I agree with about the last measure. I'm not to keen on the first three measures, but it may be because of the midi. I do however like 4-6, then it sort of drifts off i guess. Perhaps, you could use the bass figure for measure 4 in other places.

There are a few problems:

1. The notation could be fixed to make it more readable. I can guarantee nobody would want to pick this up a soon as they saw the triple dotted notes. Instead, why not think of another, possibly more readable way of expressing that Idea? For Instance, a good way would be to put the Bass cleff on silent and sing the Treble Clef yourself. If you can't read it, then perhaps you should think about changing the notation to make it clearer for you to read. Same thing with the Bass Cleff. (maybe on those dotted quarter notes try: Quarter tied to a dotted eighth tied to a thirty-second, then a thirty second. I don't know, expirement with the notation. Maybe you could even just do a half and then do that thirty-second as a grace note.)

2. Some of the harmony is very unclear. Like on measure 6, why the C# chord over a D#7? If you are writing in normal tertion harmony, then try to avoid unnecessary dissonance. It seems that the first 5 measures are very consonant, so try to keep it in that style.

3. Aviold parrallel fifths, they sound aweful in this style of harmony. They stick out like a sore thumb and really disrupt the rest of the song. I'm sure you can see this in measure 4. Why not try a different harmony, or recompose that measure into something you hear as more pleaent.

That's all I have to offer.

I liked it, and I can hear past the completely non-expressive midi performance and get the passion. I don't really understand statements like 'try to avoid unnecessary dissonance.' How much is necessary and how much is unnecessary? It's your vision, pursue it until it no longer works for you.

Now, I don't even know how you can program something to be so flat sounding, and with such unnatural sustain on the notes of a piano sample. I think that's the area you really need to focus on, honestly.

I liked it, and I can hear past the completely non-expressive midi performance and get the passion. I don't really understand statements like 'try to avoid unnecessary dissonance.' How much is necessary and how much is unnecessary? It's your vision, pursue it until it no longer works for you.

Now, I don't even know how you can program something to be so flat sounding, and with such unnatural sustain on the notes of a piano sample. I think that's the area you really need to focus on, honestly.

By unneccesary dissonance, I mean dissonance that does not fit the tyle that is being written in. Sure, it's the composers vision, but if he doesn't limit himself to at least some standards, than nothing good will be written. The piece would definitely be much more coherent if he finds more pleasent dissonances that fit more in the classical/romantic style he is writing with.

Ok, I see your point. Still--listening to this piece (other than the parallel fifths sounding a bit random and thus amateurish) I don't hear the flecks of dissonance as being outside of the style he was aiming for.

I have to say that my perspective on what is dissonant is probably different from some, because I play jazz and improvise quite a bit. Simply put, there aren't any wrong notes if you handle them the right way. It might sound like a cop out, but it's the truth--any note can work in an improvised solo in the right context. It has opened my ears over the years.

The same is true for intonation--I have perfect pitch, a blessing in my case rather than a curse because I love players like clarinetist Eddie Daniels and singer Holly Cole, both of whom us what I'll call creative intonation. At just the right time, their notes are often south of perfect, but on their instruments this creates a tension that works for me--sounds like passion. I could easily put it on some kind of graph and say "hey, she's singing flat!" but I would be missing her point.

I honestly think it can be a few bars shorter. The motive gets old really quickly... then again, MIDI destroys any emotion you wanted. The block chords in the bass is too clunky, too many notes. =P Overall, not bad!