The Anthem of Broken Dolls (Opus 25)

I would like to share with you my new composition. It was exceptionally painful and frustrating to finish, but I hope that those emotions added a bit of an artistic and melancholic spice to this silly little piece. Enjoy and thank you for listening.

Edited May 29, 20178 yr by Lilac Lucrezia

i -> iv -> ii˚7 -> V 
It's a good standard progression, but needs more development (mostly in terms of texture) to really make it pop. There are time times where I heard weird miscellaneous tones like around 1:20 I heard an E in your F minor chord which voice led poorly into D diminished.
In the second chord progression going from ii to IV is generally frowned upon because you use two different spellings of substitute chords in a row.
Throughout the piece you use a lot of inversions in the bass which is cool, but loses on some of the cinematic quality otherwise present in the piece since it's not really done for the sake of voice leading as far as I can tell. 
Interesting work.

I think the combination of colors and instruments is very nice and I like it...