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Hello everyone, I am back, this is my new piece, hope you like it

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I did mostly like this piece.  The only part I don't really care for (and would have excluded from this piece if it was mine) is the waltz-like "Allegretto Scherzando" (or maybe it was meant to be more minuet-like?).  I really think it's just totally out of character for this piece to have this section in it.  The other sections are very passionate but this just isn't on par with the mood of the rest of the piece.  That might be just me though.  Measure 93 is a cool transitional chord - I like it.  There are many roulades and figurations in this piece that are very well written I must say! (especially measures 106, 110, and 158 to the end)  Another nit-pick I have about this piece is that when your 'agitato con passione' theme comes in at m. 127, it's a very repetative melody which you then repeat again but in C minor.  It just seems like the piece loses a little steam in this section.  These are just my individual observations of course.  Thanks for the music!

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  • 3 months later...

Hi Cloud 🙂

I love it. The transitions between sections (and phrases) seemed abrupt/clunky at times, but could easily be adjusted to flow more naturally if that's something you're interested in. I think you really shone when you added bits and bobs that were beyond the pattern, if that makes sense - those bits seemed very very natural and satisfying to me as a listener.

Anyway, a good piece!

Gustav

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Well done, overall.  I did find a few spots a little awkward - in measure 18, for instance, something sounds odd about the melody, though it's hard to put my finger on why.  In some places like measures 44 and 46, there are some dissonances that sound a bit wrong to my ear, where the right hand seems to have moved on to a new chord before the left hand has.  And at m. 119, I wonder if the 3 against 5 rhythm is really serving a purpose, or if it might sound a bit better with a more straightforward rhythm in the left hand.  One more thing, and this is really a matter of individual taste I guess, is that the final shift upward from B flat minor to C minor very much has a "last verse of a pop song" connotation for me.

 

On the other hand, the melodies are nice and evocative - uncomplicated but not simplistic.  I can see how the middle section might feel out of place to some, but I think this is a case where the piece suffers from being heard in a MIDI rendition and a good performer could make the contrast less jarring.  Also, I really like the quintuplet ornaments that show up at m. 106.  Good job!

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3 hours ago, Aiwendil said:

Well done, overall.  I did find a few spots a little awkward - in measure 18, for instance, something sounds odd about the melody, though it's hard to put my finger on why.  In some places like measures 44 and 46, there are some dissonances that sound a bit wrong to my ear, where the right hand seems to have moved on to a new chord before the left hand has.  And at m. 119, I wonder if the 3 against 5 rhythm is really serving a purpose, or if it might sound a bit better with a more straightforward rhythm in the left hand.  One more thing, and this is really a matter of individual taste I guess, is that the final shift upward from B flat minor to C minor very much has a "last verse of a pop song" connotation for me.

 

On the other hand, the melodies are nice and evocative - uncomplicated but not simplistic.  I can see how the middle section might feel out of place to some, but I think this is a case where the piece suffers from being heard in a MIDI rendition and a good performer could make the contrast less jarring.  Also, I really like the quintuplet ornaments that show up at m. 106.  Good job!

 

 

Everything  @Aiwendil said! I could only dream of playingthat P11, even with the delay. Not going to happen!

 

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