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I like the ambiguous figure that later made sense after the melody asserted itself. Then the melody repeated which was even nicer. I wanted more of this. In fact, I wanted only this. Just one single mood, like grief. But then the nice jazz chord(s) came in and ruined the mood.  That's the only thing I would change, that and when the central figure returns at the end it should somehow be transformed, maybe simply harmonized, and not so naked as in the intro. In short I think it needs to be less "story" (intellectual) and more minimalist mood, if you get my meaning. 

Really nice.

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On 7/3/2017 at 6:59 PM, Ken320 said:

I like the ambiguous figure that later made sense after the melody asserted itself. Then the melody repeated which was even nicer. I wanted more of this. In fact, I wanted only this. Just one single mood, like grief. But then the nice jazz chord(s) came in and ruined the mood.  That's the only thing I would change, that and when the central figure returns at the end it should somehow be transformed, maybe simply harmonized, and not so naked as in the intro. In short I think it needs to be less "story" (intellectual) and more minimalist mood, if you get my meaning. 

Really nice.

 

Ah, yes, story. :happy: See, I'm a hopeless romantic, so the particular subject matter this piece was based on was especially, for me, important to capture story because it represented a wholistic story. I can 100% see how it would be distracting to hear something that altered the main form of the motive. My mother actually said the same thing. 
I do think the ending is a bit weak for the reasons you stated though. Will be fixed in a future version.

Thank you for your comments, you both!

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Well, then you have to ask yourself the question, what's more important, music or story? Square peg into round hole, etc. 

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I must say @Ken320 I loved the jazz chords.  Three things: score needs rehearsal numbers.  2)some parts I believe should have more counterpoint.  I get why you didn't but let the hopeless romantic have a conversation.  3)no trombone!?!? grrrrrrr

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On 7/6/2017 at 8:21 PM, maestrowick said:

score needs rehearsal numbers.

Numbers and titles trivialize rehearsal numbers, but I see where you're coming from.

On 7/6/2017 at 8:21 PM, maestrowick said:

some parts I believe should have more counterpoint.  I get why you didn't but let the hopeless romantic have a conversation.

Was that one wind trio section not enough counterpoint :blush: I found homophony to be a more useful tool in creating the togetherness feeling of the movement.

On 7/6/2017 at 8:21 PM, maestrowick said:

no trombone!?!?

Haha, yeah... No trumpet either. I would have needed like 3 trombones to get the timbre and sound I wanted, and a chamber orchestra that looks a little strange lol

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