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Hello everybody, i am new here! My name is Leonardo and i am 17 years old, i am a young composer looking for some feedback!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V5zGgmj1ilY

I would like to share this with you, hopefully you have some time left in your day and you could take a look at it! It took me 6 months to make. If you want you can comment under the video or on this site, does not really matter!

Let me know what you think 🙂

Edited by Leonardo C. Núñez
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Excuse me, you're how old???

This movement was full of tasteful surprises that I would expect to find from a seasoned composer. The themes were quite catchy and, I thought, developed very well over the course of the piece. I also enjoyed the scoring for a small orchestra of woodwinds and strings. I don't know if the rest of the symphony is for that instrumentation, but it worked wonderfully for this movement.

There were some issues with the score—nothing major. Forgive me for being lazy, but it's too time-consuming for me to thoroughly analyze a score as it scrolls along in a YouTube video, so I can't give specific instances. If you could attach it as a PDF, now, that would be something. 😉 

In short, this is a charming work brimming with musical ideas and freshness. I look forward to hearing more from you!

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1 hour ago, Tónskáld said:

Excuse me, you're how old???

This movement was full of tasteful surprises that I would expect to find from a seasoned composer. The themes were quite catchy and, I thought, developed very well over the course of the piece. I also enjoyed the scoring for a small orchestra of woodwinds and strings. I don't know if the rest of the symphony is for that instrumentation, but it worked wonderfully for this movement.

There were some issues with the score—nothing major. Forgive me for being lazy, but it's too time-consuming for me to thoroughly analyze a score as it scrolls along in a YouTube video, so I can't give specific instances. If you could attach it as a PDF, now, that would be something. 😉 

In short, this is a charming work brimming with musical ideas and freshness. I look forward to hearing more from you!

 

Thank you! I am going to put the PDF right now for you and everybody else, I very much appreciate the comment! have a nice day 🙂

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mind bending chromaticism. A perspective changing piece. It gives me much more drive to learn more about orchestration, it's so complex and coherent. And all at 17?? I am a small fish in a much larger pond after hearing this. Truly spectacular!!

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2 minutes ago, Left Unexplained said:

mind bending chromaticism. A perspective changing piece. It gives me much more drive to learn more about orchestration, it's so complex and coherent. And all at 17?? I am a small fish in a much larger pond after hearing this. Truly spectacular!!

 

I am very happy you enjoyed it 🙂

 

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That's a very imaginative piece. Lots going on. Great job. What did you use for playback?

Oh, about your score, it would be better to include instrument designations at the beginning of each system. Just abbreviations. Makes it easier to make sense of.

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5 hours ago, Mister Red said:

That's a very imaginative piece. Lots going on. Great job. What did you use for playback?

Oh, about your score, it would be better to include instrument designations at the beginning of each system. Just abbreviations. Makes it easier to make sense of.

 

I will keep that in mind. I made the score using notion 6, also the playback is from notion 6.

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5 hours ago, Leonardo C. Núñez said:

I will keep that in mind. I made the score using notion 6, also the playback is from notion 6.

 

How are you liking Notion? I used it back in the day but switched to Sibelius. I liked the sound samples better on Notion but making a score look good was way easier with Sibelius. I dig the piece!

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6 minutes ago, Thatguy v2.0 said:

How are you liking Notion? I used it back in the day but switched to Sibelius. I liked the sound samples better on Notion but making a score look good was way easier with Sibelius. I dig the piece!

 

My parents bought Notion for me like 2 years ago or something, i have never used a different software before so i don't really know if it is better etc. But I like it, and I think it hasn't creatively helt me back or anything yet. I don't know if I will always use notion or switch to something else ever, but for now it has been very useful . It is good to hear that you dig the piece 🙂

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So, here are some pointers regarding the score.

The most consistent error I found was that the string parts don't indicate whether chords of notes should be played divisi or non-divisi. Since the stringed instruments are capable of polyphony (i.e., striking up to 4 notes at once), it is important to notate whether you wish for the chord to be spread out among the players or played as a stop, like so:

image.png.e9a34ed578a505358ddab5e3e297ac3a.png

(These are the staves for Violin I and II, respectively.) Notice how "div." is written as technique text when the notes split, which indicates that half of the players should play the top note, and the other half plays the bottom. When they come back together, it's helpful to write "unis." above the notes.

Page 1—

  • I think you misspelled the clarinet part. In Dutch, the spelling is "Klarinet" (you have "Klatinet").
  • Bar 2, Bass: going from a slurred bow to a pizz note is impractical unless you want the player to do a left-hand pizz. In that case, a "+" should be placed above the note
  • Bar 2 and beyond, bass & celli: the half-note pizz will be a bit troubling for players, who are used to seeing pizz notes as quarter notes (or less). When they see the half notes, they may be wondering if you meant to indicate arco (as I did). If you're wanting the pizz effect to be sustained over a half-note beat, I would change those notes to quarter notes and put the expression text "l.v. sempre" beneath the first passage. Or just leave them as quarter notes and be done with it.
  • Bar 10, woodwinds: it's a good idea to put a dynamic marking in between those hairpins so the players know how loud they're supposed to play
  • Bar 11 & 12, Fagot: the first G and E... are those to be played "a2" or by only one of the parts?
  • Bar 14, strings: do you want that slide played as a glissando (a very deliberate slide) or portamento (a more subtle slide)? It sounds more like portamento in the playback. While strings can perform glissando, it's more common (and faster) to perform portamento, which seems more appropriate between the two 8th notes in your piece.
  • All strings: there are a few passages where you have a pizz note immediately followed by an arco. In practice, it takes a few seconds for a string player to adequately adjust between the two articulations. I would try to avoid that as much as possible and leave at least a quarter note rest in between the switches.

Okay, that's probably enough for now (sorry it's so much!). Please let me know what questions you may have as you look over these tips. You've done a great job; I hope you don't get discouraged reading these!

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4 minutes ago, Tónskáld said:

So, here are some pointers regarding the score.

The most consistent error I found was that the string parts don't indicate whether chords of notes should be played divisi or non-divisi. Since the stringed instruments are capable of polyphony (i.e., striking up to 4 notes at once), it is important to notate whether you wish for the chord to be spread out among the players or played as a stop, like so:

image.png.e9a34ed578a505358ddab5e3e297ac3a.png

(These are the staves for Violin I and II, respectively.) Notice how "div." is written as technique text when the notes split, which indicates that half of the players should play the top note, and the other half plays the bottom. When they come back together, it's helpful to write "unis." above the notes.

Page 1—

  • I think you misspelled the clarinet part. In Dutch, the spelling is "Klarinet" (you have "Klatinet").
  • Bar 2, Bass: going from a slurred bow to a pizz note is impractical unless you want the player to do a left-hand pizz. In that case, a "+" should be placed above the note
  • Bar 2 and beyond, bass & celli: the half-note pizz will be a bit troubling for players, who are used to seeing pizz notes as quarter notes (or less). When they see the half notes, they may be wondering if you meant to indicate arco (as I did). If you're wanting the pizz effect to be sustained over a half-note beat, I would change those notes to quarter notes and put the expression text "l.v. sempre" beneath the first passage. Or just leave them as quarter notes and be done with it.
  • Bar 10, woodwinds: it's a good idea to put a dynamic marking in between those hairpins so the players know how loud they're supposed to play
  • Bar 11 & 12, Fagot: the first G and E... are those to be played "a2" or by only one of the parts?
  • Bar 14, strings: do you want that slide played as a glissando (a very deliberate slide) or portamento (a more subtle slide)? It sounds more like portamento in the playback. While strings can perform glissando, it's more common (and faster) to perform portamento, which seems more appropriate between the two 8th notes in your piece.
  • All strings: there are a few passages where you have a pizz note immediately followed by an arco. In practice, it takes a few seconds for a string player to adequately adjust between the two articulations. I would try to avoid that as much as possible and leave at least a quarter note rest in between the switches.

Okay, that's probably enough for now (sorry it's so much!). Please let me know what questions you may have as you look over these tips. You've done a great job; I hope you don't get discouraged reading these!

 

Thank you very much! All these tips are very handy and useful. About the div and unis: I usually don't really mind how it is played, as long as the notes are being played. And my mother who is a violinist at the concertgebouw says that the players would chose them selfs how they would play it. But it is good that you say it, i will pay a bit more attention to it. The clarinet part name of course is a typo XD! Thank you again, because these are the type of tips and help i need!

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1 minute ago, Leonardo C. Núñez said:

And my mother who is a violinist at the concertgebouw says that the players would chose them selfs how they would play it.

This is very true! (And the default is usually to play it divisi.) But I honestly think it has more to do with how others perceive you as a composer. If a composer neglects to clear up points of confusion, he may very likely be perceived as sloppy or lazy. Plus, it comes across as courteous to the orchestra: "Ah, here is a composer who put himself in our shoes and thought about how we might interpret these passages."

Be kind to your orchestra, and your orchestra will be kind to you. 🙂 

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28 minutes ago, Tónskáld said:

This is very true! (And the default is usually to play it divisi.) But I honestly think it has more to do with how others perceive you as a composer. If a composer neglects to clear up points of confusion, he may very likely be perceived as sloppy or lazy. Plus, it comes across as courteous to the orchestra: "Ah, here is a composer who put himself in our shoes and thought about how we might interpret these passages."

Be kind to your orchestra, and your orchestra will be kind to you. 🙂 

 

Ah that is indeed a good view to have! I will keep it in mind

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3 minutes ago, danishali903 said:

Very impressive for a 17 year old...great job! The movement has very Shostakovich-esque qualities. I think @Tónskáld did a good job of explaining the things I was going to mention.

 

Thank you! Shostakovich is by far my favourite composer, I will probably grow into my own style after a while 🙂

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Some nice chromaticism you have there. I am not sure if I find the form itself convincing, but judging the form of only one movement from a symphony is always tricky. 

Ik las dat je compositie gaat studeren in Nederland? Nice! Welk conservatorium en bij welke docenten? Ik studeer zelf in Den Haag met Martijn Padding en Calliope Tsoupaki. Dan zullen we elkaar vast wel eens zien, want heb ook compositievrienden in Amsterdam zitten. 

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2 hours ago, Maarten Bauer said:

Some nice chromaticism you have there. I am not sure if I find the form itself convincing, but judging the form of only one movement from a symphony is always tricky. 

Ik las dat je compositie gaat studeren in Nederland? Nice! Welk conservatorium en bij welke docenten? Ik studeer zelf in Den Haag met Martijn Padding en Calliope Tsoupaki. Dan zullen we elkaar vast wel eens zien, want heb ook compositievrienden in Amsterdam zitten. 

 

Haha, ik ga studeren in Amsterdam en weet eigenlijk ook nog niet eens zeker wat voor docenten ik heb hahah. Ik had me eigenlijk ook nog te laat ingeschreven maar na mijn interview en theorie examen wouden ze me toch nog toe laten! Maar wel een leuk idee om elkaar eens tegen te komen, ik zal je naam onthouden!

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2 hours ago, Leonardo C. Núñez said:

Haha, ik ga studeren in Amsterdam en weet eigenlijk ook nog niet eens zeker wat voor docenten ik heb hahah. Ik had me eigenlijk ook nog te laat ingeschreven maar na mijn interview en theorie examen wouden ze me toch nog toe laten! Maar wel een leuk idee om elkaar eens tegen te komen, ik zal je naam onthouden!

 

Ah, als je de keuze krijgt. Ga voor Willem Jeths.

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Wow, that's really impressive, you have used many different techniques, articulations and textures here. That's a very colorful movement and I aggre the style reminds me of schostakowitsch. I love the solo passages with pizz. accompaniment.

Thank's for sharing!

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Just now, Guillem82 said:

Wow, that's really impressive, you have used many different techniques, articulations and textures here. That's a very colorful movement and I aggre the style reminds me of schostakowitsch. I love the solo passages with pizz. accompaniment.

Thank's for sharing!

 

thanks, i am happy you liked it

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All the time that I heard this movement it reminded me of another piece that I could not remeber, after some time thinking it came to my mind (so I'm going to coment about it :facepalm:). I do not know why this piece reminds me to "Uranus the Magician" from the suite "The Planets". It is great because is my favorite planent of the suite. I just love this movement, the first one I like it as well  but for the moment this one is my favorite. Great job! 

 

PS: I love the casual ending of the movement. 

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20 minutes ago, Hendrik Meniere said:

All the time that I heard this movement it reminded me of another piece that I could not remeber, after some time thinking it came to my mind (so I'm going to coment about it :facepalm:). I do not know why this piece reminds me to "Uranus the Magician" from the suite "The Planets". It is great because is my favorite planent of the suite. I just love this movement, the first one I like it as well  but for the moment this one is my favorite. Great job! 

 

PS: I love the casual ending of the movement. 

 

thank you so much! thats means a lot to hear from someone. Funny thing is that i wrote the ending way before i wrote section E. And section C was written as last because it felt a little bit to much to same, thats why it is a bit different from the rest (Of course not a totally different feeling, otherwise it wouldn't fit in the movement). And the longer flute solo in the end was the last thing i wrote in the movement, because i thought i might have not made enough fun flute solos/moments.

It's weird to think how i make my music, in the end it seems a lot simpeler then it was. Just so everybody knows, i had not fricking idea what the hell i was writing or why. I just went with the flow.

Edited by Leonardo C. Núñez
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