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http://picosong.com/Gtvv/

I would love to have some feedback! It is my first time composing something as complex as this so any tips or advice would very much help. Thank you!

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Not bad for a first try in the slightest!
You did a very intuitive compositional technique of making the repeated chord progression less obvious by adding things into the texture, which was a great move. 
However, I would still suggest you change the chord progression in the beginning a little more. You did a really good job in the latter half, but a little more variation in the beginning would be a nice change of pace.
This is a personal thing, but I like for things to resolve in the end... you ending on a bII chord works very well, but feels incomplete. You don't have to resolve it to the minor one chord if you don't want.
The counterpoint (or multiple melodic lines at once) was actually quite well done. However, it gets very cluttered and tones start to cross each other on the staff. This opens the very convoluted subject of "voice leading" which you'll get more of a sense of as you go along, but with such a large number of things going on at once, the direction or flow of the piece can be stifled a little bit. 
Just things to think about. Keep up the good work!

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46 minutes ago, Monarcheon said:

Not bad for a first try in the slightest!
You did a very intuitive compositional technique of making the repeated chord progression less obvious by adding things into the texture, which was a great move. 
However, I would still suggest you change the chord progression in the beginning a little more. You did a really good job in the latter half, but a little more variation in the beginning would be a nice change of pace.
This is a personal thing, but I like for things to resolve in the end... you ending on a bII chord works very well, but feels incomplete. You don't have to resolve it to the minor one chord if you don't want.
The counterpoint (or multiple melodic lines at once) was actually quite well done. However, it gets very cluttered and tones start to cross each other on the staff. This opens the very convoluted subject of "voice leading" which you'll get more of a sense of as you go along, but with such a large number of things going on at once, the direction or flow of the piece can be stifled a little bit. 
Just things to think about. Keep up the good work!

 

Thank you so much for the constructive feedback! Yes, it is indeed a little repetitive in the beginning as the layers slowly build. I will definitely have a look at it! The middle section with all the polyphony was quite experimental for me and I was trying to present counter-melodies against the acoustic guitar but yes, I can see why it can sound a little clashy with all the hustle and bustle but I will slowly learn! Hehe! I sing too much baroque in Choir... 

In terms of the ending, in my head, it was always a modulation into B flat major from D minor and ending on the sub-dominant chord. I am for some reason in love with unresolved cadences. Mozart would have definitely shot me. XD

I have never had composition classes so a few of the things you have explained to me are completely new but I understand them! I am still a music student and I'm not even old enough to go to university yet! I do wonder how the demographic on this forum is like considering the name of it. Anyway, I have much to learn.There is a reason a lot of composers hated their earlier works after all. ^^

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I think it very well done for a first attempt..  You have some very nice things going on..  My personal opinion would be , to soften the snare drum, it draws too much attention to itself. Or perhaps use the stick sound of the snare..  Built the drums like you did some of the different parts.. Start drums a bit simpler.. maybe kick alone for 2-4 bars, then stick, less busy pattern for a couple of bars, then full on.  A simpler tom roll.  excellent drum stop at end.. 

On 4th listen now.. I love the interweaving of parts.  yes good work..

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On 09/03/2017 at 0:31 AM, markstyles said:

I think it very well done for a first attempt..  You have some very nice things going on..  My personal opinion would be , to soften the snare drum, it draws too much attention to itself. Or perhaps use the stick sound of the snare..  Built the drums like you did some of the different parts.. Start drums a bit simpler.. maybe kick alone for 2-4 bars, then stick, less busy pattern for a couple of bars, then full on.  A simpler tom roll.  excellent drum stop at end.. 

On 4th listen now.. I love the interweaving of parts.  yes good work..

 

I am amateur when it comes to writing for drums. It suppose composing for it comes with time and practice! Thank you for your contribution and apologies for the super late reply. Thank you for liking the bits of polyphony ^^ Although, it can sound a little busy at times...

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Hi Kmshna;

One exercise I used to do a lot to improve arranging, is write out a detailed analysis of songs for myself.  I started with graph paper and drew in a line. for every instrument  that might start and stop, more wave if the part got busier, larger if the part got louder etc.  You can make  up your own icons, for different ideas.. you soon create a vocabulary for yourself.  Find other songs that have ideas you want to incorporate, I had to listen to a lot of ballads with drums to get the feel of what a good drummer can do.. 

I did this for every instrument..  Then used colored felt tip pens when motifs, melodies were repeated on each track..

I eventually created a singing bunch of symbols...  Sometimes I would notate the melody.. But other times just teach them the melody.. Then I would mark it up with felt tip pens, to symbolize, soft whisper, crescendo the energy or melody up/down..  staccato notes, long held out notes little steps for several notes on a vowel to move etc. I too can get too busy with  multiple interweaving of parts, I love to do it. But got  complaints..  I think the brain can take up to 4 - 6 different melodic parts at once, then it becomes to confusing, and the listener loses interest.  If the parts are closely related, more can happen,, and it can get very interweaving, if it goes back to be simpler too.. all of this depends of the style or music and your particular skills..  Yes, time and practice, and an instant playback medium.. you play it, and hear it back right away..

I quite often play pieces all nite when I go to bed..  So I hear them a lot of times before I fall asleep.. Also just play and repeat while sitting around listening.. I make up a mental list, and then fix the issues..  Something may sound great the first bunch of listenings but by the 40th,,  just sound like some extra stuck in, or it serves no musical need. 

I would often scour the internet for good midi arrangements, or even buy some. I would lay them up in Logic Pro's score Editor, to get a visual sense of what they had done.. Even though this piece didn't have much in common with my piece.. It was a great visual aid, the in the build up and resolution of musical density.. 

Eventually I took some online courses at Berklee music.. Great but expensive..  There are free courses on line. Coursera.org is one. there are others.  These will not curtail your creativity, contrary to what self taught musicians might tell you..  They are tools. You then decide when to use that tool, or modify it to suit your needs. But the point is you know of it, and what it can add to your musical abilities.. 

Keep up the great work.. 

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On 18/03/2017 at 9:49 PM, markstyles said:

Hi Kmshna;

One exercise I used to do a lot to improve arranging, is write out a detailed analysis of songs for myself.  I started with graph paper and drew in a line. for every instrument  that might start and stop, more wave if the part got busier, larger if the part got louder etc.  You can make  up your own icons, for different ideas.. you soon create a vocabulary for yourself.  Find other songs that have ideas you want to incorporate, I had to listen to a lot of ballads with drums to get the feel of what a good drummer can do.. 

I did this for every instrument..  Then used colored felt tip pens when motifs, melodies were repeated on each track..

I eventually created a singing bunch of symbols...  Sometimes I would notate the melody.. But other times just teach them the melody.. Then I would mark it up with felt tip pens, to symbolize, soft whisper, crescendo the energy or melody up/down..  staccato notes, long held out notes little steps for several notes on a vowel to move etc. I too can get too busy with  multiple interweaving of parts, I love to do it. But got  complaints..  I think the brain can take up to 4 - 6 different melodic parts at once, then it becomes to confusing, and the listener loses interest.  If the parts are closely related, more can happen,, and it can get very interweaving, if it goes back to be simpler too.. all of this depends of the style or music and your particular skills..  Yes, time and practice, and an instant playback medium.. you play it, and hear it back right away..

I quite often play pieces all nite when I go to bed..  So I hear them a lot of times before I fall asleep.. Also just play and repeat while sitting around listening.. I make up a mental list, and then fix the issues..  Something may sound great the first bunch of listenings but by the 40th,,  just sound like some extra stuck in, or it serves no musical need. 

I would often scour the internet for good midi arrangements, or even buy some. I would lay them up in Logic Pro's score Editor, to get a visual sense of what they had done.. Even though this piece didn't have much in common with my piece.. It was a great visual aid, the in the build up and resolution of musical density.. 

Eventually I took some online courses at Berklee music.. Great but expensive..  There are free courses on line. Coursera.org is one. there are others.  These will not curtail your creativity, contrary to what self taught musicians might tell you..  They are tools. You then decide when to use that tool, or modify it to suit your needs. But the point is you know of it, and what it can add to your musical abilities.. 

Keep up the great work.. 

 

Wow... I have never realised music is a graphical way before... I will definitely try it out! This piece may perhaps be a long WIP indeed ^^ Thank you very much.

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